The Silent Season
After a year of silence on this blog, I thought it was time for a heartful reflection. Sometimes words need time to mature, like wine in old wineskins, and other times the author just needs to be inspired to write. I have experienced a little of both over the past year. The words wouldn’t come, and then suddenly, like spring rain, they began to flow again. Through it all, it has truly been a testimony to God’s faithfulness through both valleys and mountaintops.
“For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.” – Ecclesiastes 3:1 NLT
Four Years of Grief and Grace
Last week marked four years since Melinda went home to be with Jesus. The pain of loss never truly disappears, but like David, I can say:
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.” – Psalm 34:18 NLT
Melinda was a woman who exemplified the virtues described in Proverbs 31 – a godly woman whose worth was far above rubies. Her legacy continues to shape who I am today. This fall, God led me to facilitate a Griefshare group, allowing me to walk alongside others on their journey through loss. While guiding others through their grief was a privilege, I found myself revisiting the difficult memories of Melinda’s battle with cancer. Each session stirred up emotions I thought had settled, yet I trust that God used both my pain and healing to minister to those who came seeking comfort.
“All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.” – 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 NLT
New Chapters of Love
In His infinite wisdom and mercy, God blessed me with another chance at love. My new wife, April, is also a testament to His goodness, bringing different yet equally beautiful qualities to my life. Together, we’ve learned that:
“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” – Romans 8:28 NLT
It still amazes me how blessed I have been to have had two beautiful, godly women in my life. Like the virtuous woman described in scripture, both Melinda and April reflect different facets of God’s grace. Their unique strengths and faith journeys remind me of how God provides exactly what we need in each season of life.
“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.” – James 1:17 NKJV
The Lord’s provision often exceeds our understanding, showing us that His plans are greater than our own. As Solomon wrote: “Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies.” – Proverbs 31:10 NLT
The Temple Ages
As the years advance, this earthly temple shows its wear. I recently started having back problems, a daily reminder of my mortality and the fragility of our physical bodies. Yet even in physical decline, there are lessons to be learned:
“So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self[a] is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.” – 2 Corinthians 4:16 ESV
My thoughts often turn to my grandmother, Nina Newman, whose journey with chronic back pain shaped our family’s understanding of perseverance. After a workplace injury at ER Carpenter in Temple, Texas, she endured roughly seven back surgeries throughout her life. When my own back pain flares up, I’m humbled remembering her unwavering spirit. While my discomfort pales in comparison to what she endured, her example teaches me about grace under suffering. She demonstrated what Paul wrote about when he said:
“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” – 2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV
Misery of Divorce
If you have read this far, then you likely know that my wife, April, came to our marriage having walked through divorce. She and her ex-husband share three precious children, who have become deeply dear to my heart. As their stepfather, I’ve taken on the sacred responsibility of helping to protect and nurture these young souls.
“Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed.” – Psalm 82:3 NIV
What continues to break my heart is watching how their father’s actions cause emotional and spiritual wounds in his own children’s lives. This weekend, he will force his oldest daughter to undergo another baptism at his father’s church, disregarding and diminishing the authentic baptism she has already experienced with her youth pastor months ago. Such actions seem driven more by control than genuine spiritual concern, using sacred ceremonies as tools of manipulation rather than celebrations of faith.
“Jesus said, ‘Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.'” – Matthew 19:14 NIV
As I witness these challenges, I’m reminded that our role is to be a steady source of God’s love and truth in these children’s lives. While we cannot control others’ actions, we can provide a safe harbor where faith can flourish without coercion:
“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.” – Ephesians 6:4 NLT
Lollie and Pop’s New Chapter
The greatest joy I am currently looking forward to is the birth of my first grandson. Megan is due March 21st, and my heart overflows with anticipation. There’s something profoundly moving about watching your child prepare to become a parent – a sacred passing of the torch that spans generations. April and I are embracing our soon-to-be roles as Lollie and Pop with pure delight, our hearts already full of love for this little one we have yet to meet.
“Grandchildren are the crowning glory of the aged; parents are the pride of their children.” – Proverbs 17:6 NLT
Like Sarah, who laughed with joy at God’s promise of a child in her later years, we find ourselves filled with wonder at this precious gift. Each ultrasound picture, each nursery preparation, and each small milestone brings us closer to meeting this new little blessing who will carry our love into the next generation.
“Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.” – Psalm 127:3
The anticipation of holding him, watching him grow, and sharing in the joy of his life reminds me again of God’s perfect timing and endless blessings. March can’t come soon enough!
Finding Joy in the Journey
Despite physical challenges and life’s changes – from the depths of grief to the heights of new love, from back pain to the anticipation of a grandson – joy remains available through Christ. It’s not the superficial happiness the world offers, but a deep-rooted joy that comes from knowing Him:
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.” – James 1:2-3 NIV
Through all seasons – the loss of Melinda, the blessing of finding April, the challenges of step-parenting, physical pain, and now the approaching joy of becoming grandparents – God’s faithfulness remains constant. He continues to write my story, showing that beauty can indeed rise from ashes and that joy comes in the morning. Even when facing the darkness of watching loved ones struggle or bodies failing, His light penetrates the shadows.
“And Nehemiah[a] continued, “Go and celebrate with a feast of rich foods and sweet drinks, and share gifts of food with people who have nothing prepared. This is a sacred day before our Lord. Don’t be dejected and sad, for the joy of the Lord is your strength!” – Nehemiah 8:10 NLT
I will continue to search for Joy in Jesus until the day I am called home, knowing that each chapter He writes in my life – whether marked by tears or triumph – serves His greater purpose. I am very excited to celebrate with a feast at Thanksgiving and Christmas and to see family and friends especially my brothers and sisters in Christ.
If you do not know the joy that comes from knowing Jesus, let me know. I would love to tell you all about it.
