Today marks the third anniversary of Melinda’s going home to be with Jesus. The last three years have been heart-wrenching, transformative, and thanks to Jesus, JOYFUL. As I write this posting I find myself reflecting on the many ways God has used grief to reshape my life. Melinda, a beacon of light and love, battled brain cancer with grace and bravery. As I have said before Melinda and my grandma are two of the strongest women I have ever known. During Melinda’s cancer fight, I turned to blogging as an outlet, a way to make sense of the turmoil I was trying to process. Little did I know, that this act of expression would become a cornerstone in my healing process.
Grief, as I’ve learned, is not a linear path but a complex landscape that one navigates with no clear map. It’s been three years, yet there are days when the loss feels as raw as it did in those first moments. However, my faith has been an anchor, offering a perspective that transforms despair into hope. Throughout it all I held fast to Isaiah 55:8, “For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways,” declares Yahweh.
In the darkest times, I have found solace in scripture, particularly in the words that speak of hope and resurrection in Jesus. These verses have been a source of comfort, reminding me that death is not an end, but a transition to an eternal life with my God and my Jesus.
John 11:25-26: Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die — ever. Do you believe this?”
These words spoken by Jesus to Martha, just before he resurrected Lazarus, have been a profound reminder that in Christ, death is not the final word. Our physical demise is just a passage into an eternal life with Him.
Revelation 21:4: “…He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain. The first things passed away.“
This promise of a future where pain and suffering are no more helps to ease my aching heart. It speaks of a divine reassurance that our trials and tribulations are temporary.
Philippians 1:21: “For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.“
Paul’s words often remind me that our life on earth is an opportunity to serve and glorify Christ, and death is a gateway to being in His glorious presence forever. It is why I try to seek out ways that I can be of service to others, although not always successfully.
1 Thessalonians 4:13-14: “And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died.“
These verses have been instrumental in shaping my understanding that one day we will be called home either through death or rapture. As believers, we can grieve with the knowledge that we will be reunited with our loved ones in Heaven.
I have been attending a grief support group called GriefShare. GriefShare is a safe, welcoming place where people understand the difficult emotions of grief. To learn more about GriefShare visit https://www.griefshare.org. I was not sure why I signed up but I now believe it was the Holy Spirit urging me. God used it to meet the prayers of others and to help me know that this blog truly did help me process Melinda’s death in a healthy way. GriefShare also showed me that grief is not something to “get over,” but a profound experience that shapes and molds us.
As I arrived at Christ Chapel South Campus today to participate in and help facilitate GriefShare: Surviving the Holidays I looked over at a Magnolia Tree and started to cry. There was one flower still in bloom. Melinda loved Magnolias and just seeing it reminded me of her. I took a picture of it.
It still amazes me how the smallest details can sometimes set off a chain of emotions such as a flower or a song. If you are dealing with the death of a close family and/or friend and need strategies to cope I would highly recommend GriefShare.
As I continue to navigate this journey of grief and healing, I am constantly reminded of the hope we have in Jesus. It is a hope that transcends our earthly understanding, a hope that assures us that our loved ones are in a place of eternal peace and joy. Blogging through my wife’s cancer journey has been therapeutic, a way to externalize the internal storm and find clarity amidst chaos.
In closing, I encourage anyone grappling with loss to seek solace in faith, community, and most importantly, JESUS. While the journey of grief is uniquely personal, you do not have to walk it alone. There is hope in Jesus, a promise of eternal life, and a community of believers ready to support and uplift you in your darkest moments. Remember, in Christ, death is but a passage to a glorious, everlasting life.
